By Susan Lee, LCSW
“There are three things that amaze me –
no, four things that I don’t understand:
how an eagle glides through the sky,
how a ship navigates the ocean,
how a man loves a woman.”
Proverbs 30:18-19 (New Living Translation)
Even the Bible addresses how profound and amazing a man and a woman’s love for each other can be. The complexity. It is amazing that two people, two imperfect people can stay intimately connected for 50 years plus. It’s almost unfathomable in our society; because people naturally want their own needs met and want their own way. Marriage is a delicate dance between giving and taking; it is “for better or for worse”; and some seasons in a marriage, consist of more giving and “for worse.” It is in those times that it is hardest.
Most people don’t wake up intentionally wanting to hurt the other person. By discovering what brings on hurt, anger and frustration, you will be able to improve your communication, increase understanding and bring peace back into your relationship. Marriage is about listening more than speaking; about putting oneself aside to hear another person’s perspective; to care more about another person’s desires, wants, and needs – more than your own. It is also about taking responsibility for your own needs, understanding what they really are, and communicating those needs to your partner. It is about learning how to listen to one another.
Marriage takes a commitment and desire from both people to work towards a connected, passionate, loving, intimate relationship. Once both people are committed to getting help to have this type of relationship, anything is possible. Call today to discuss how we can work with you to bring the best out of your upcoming or ongoing marriage.